The Morning After

Presently, as I studied this new morning, I felt a hand briefly caress my back. It slid up to my right shoulder, then, a second hand gently squeezed my other side as a warm face pressed against the back of my neck and a quiet voice whispered, “I’ll be back in bed if you need me.”  I tilted my head and raised my shoulder so I could press my cheek against the back of her soft hand.  I reached up and touched her gently.  Then she was gone, but I could tell that her heart too, was healing.  How long had it been since I had heard her sing?  There came that soft, sweet melody once again floating on the cool morning air. 

Doctor Manning happened to pass by, wearing a peculiar grin, a look I had never seen on her face before.  “Good morning,” she said, musically.  “Did you sleep well?”

“Not particularly,” I responded, making no mention of someone resting in my bed.

“I suspected as much,” she said, without turning around, and in a matter of fact manner that betrayed her knowledge of the night’s events. I’m sure my eyebrows rose as I envisioned the good doctor sitting at her desk, nodding and passing out advice to a certain young lady concerning her love life and was now convinced that last night’s activities had been of her devising.  And, it had worked. 

Suddenly, I heard the music again, quiet at first, then a little louder.  It was Lise, singing a song I thought long forgotten, one from her homeland in Africa.  There were those high silky sounds that only she could produce, that made my hair stand on end. 

A few moments later, I shook my head slowly and with a broad smile, one I had not worn for a couple of years, turned and joyfully returned to my bed and her waiting outstretched arms where I would spend several sleepless hours entangled in her warmth and love.  I had not had a heart attack.  To the contrary, I was a man reborn.  Today, the world was a better, happier place.  Since that tragic event so few months ago, this had become the best day of my entire life.  I couldn't have felt better.  Hope lived on. 

***

Lise had discretely left my quarters looking this way and that before exiting my room and carefully returned to hers although I wasn’t sure this was necessary.  That didn’t diminish the excitement in her as her roommates pummeled her with questions, many of which, Lise would not answer.  With so few of us and so few rooms to go around, the only ones who knew nothing, or were at least presumed to be ignorant of the facts were the Doctor, Bruce and Daniel.  The former’s knowledge of events, I had figured at least, was as it would be stated in legal terms, accessory before the fact.  The boys, on the other hand, unless they had actually seen Lise enter or leave my quarters were completely out of the loop.

It was still early in the day when I met up with Carol in the woods.  She said nothing much at first, but just kept the conversation about the weather.  For someone who had to have known about last night, she was pretty tight lipped.  Then, feeling as if we were alone, she entered my personal space, put her arms around me and uncharacteristically, planted a sustained kiss on my cheek.  She immediately stepped back and with a big smile congratulated me.

“You know, Warren, I wondered if you would ever catch that kid.  She certainly gave you lots of opportunities.”

“What do you mean?  Me catch her?  I wasn’t chasing her.”

“Whether you realize it or not, Warren, I saw how you acted when she was around you.”

“Everyone’s different around her,” I defended myself.

“Everyone, as in Bruce, or Daniel?”

“I never noticed either of them taking any interest in Lise.”

“Exactly!  They didn’t.  But whenever she was around you, you went starry eyed.”

“Oh, come on.  I’m not a teenager.”

“No, but you were in love with her.  That was obvious to everyone except you.”  I was about to speak, but Carol cut me off.  “Actually, I’m not sure if it wasn’t obvious to you, too.  You just didn’t want to admit it.”

“I’m an old man.  What child would want an old man?”

“Obviously, Lise wanted you.”

“It’s not like she had a lot to pick from.”

“She’s probably had her eyes on you since kindergarten.”  A broad smile appeared on her face.

“Now you’re being ridiculous.  She’s not that kind of girl.”

“Warren, you may be a little older than her, well, actually a lot older, but I can assure you, you are a good looking man.  Don’t put yourself down.  And, in my opinion, you’re a good man.  That’s important to Lise.”

“Did you talk her into coming to see me?”

“Well, not exactly.  It was her idea, but she did come to me for advice.”

“And?”

“And I told her to follow her heart.  It is a gentle, kind, sweet heart, too, so be nice to her, Warren.  She’s gone through a lot.  In her eyes, you’re all she has left.”

I'd had enough of the conversation.  I made as if I were going to restart my walk.  “It’s been nice talking to you, Carol.  We should meet like this more often.”  I was about to turn and leave, when Carol gave me another kiss on the cheek.

“See you around camp, then,” she said, turning around and walking in the direction of her cave.

***

No more than fifteen minutes had passed as I sauntered along the now dry cross-country ski trail, when I heard the snapping of the twigs behind me and turning around, caught sight of Lise.   My heart skipped a beat.  She was wearing a most uncharacteristic expression.  “Lise, my darling, what a surprise!  Did you come to accompany me on the trail?”

She said nothing until she was upon me.  “What have you done to me?  I thought you loved me.  You told me that last night.  Or did you just make that up so you could have your fun?”

“Excuse me?  Lise, what are you talking about?  Of course I love you.  What’s gotten into you?”

“All night long you hold me, kiss me, make love to me and tell me how much I mean to you and then this.”  She grabbed at my arm and then started to pound on my chest.

“What this are you talking about?”  I had to deflect her blows as they were coming pretty hard.

She was crying freely now, but between sobs, out came the words, “Doctor Manning…kissing…hugging…kissing.” 

"Lise, are you listening to yourself?"  She certainly wasn't acting rational, for it had been she who'd offered herself to me.  If she could remember the entire dialogue from our night together and her apparent talk with Carol, she wouldn't have jumped to any conclusions.  But, here we were.  She had either seen or been told of my encounter with the good doctor, the doctor who meant a great deal to me, but who would never find herself in another relationship with a man.  This would have been comical if Lise’s pain were not so evident.  I tried to console her, reassuring her that she meant the entire world to me, but she would have none of it.  She spurned my touch, but I managed to grab hold and hang on long enough to give her a message.  “Lise, you don’t understand.  I do love you, but you will have to just go and tell Doctor Manning.  Make her understand.  Please.”  I hoped that I had given her the impression that Carol was after me.

Lise jerked herself free and stomped off toward camp.  I figured that by the time I got back, if Lise had gone directly to see Carol that she might be ready to speak to me again.  I wasn’t sure how Carol would handle this, but I felt that it was partly her fault.  After all, she'd never kissed me before.  It had even taken me by surprise.

When I got back to camp, everyone was in sight but Lise.  Wherever could she have gone?  Doctor Manning saw me coming and headed in my direction. 

“Warren, I just had a chat with a young lady.  You might want to find her and have a chat with her yourself.”

“I will.  Thanks.”  And with that, I walked about the camp speaking to the girls and both boys, asking if they'd seen her.  She wasn't in her quarters and I knew that she wouldn't be with the boys.  And since Doctor Manning had been the one to tell me to speak with her, I was certain she wasn't hanging out in the dispensary. I finally figured that she'd probably taken another walk.  I'd talk to her when she returned. 

I entered my quarters, closed my door and reached for the lamp switch.   Nothing!  I reached my hand to the bulb and found it was missing.  That was odd.  I was about to open the door when the sound of and the light from a match drew my attention to the corner of my room where my bed was located.  The match moved ghost-like in the darkness until the room began to glow in the pale light of a single candle.  Someone was in the room and that someone had to be Lise.  I followed the light, so to speak, for I knew it was a special place, but not for the dead.  In this case, it was for the living.

It was such a small candle and my eyes having been just outside in the sunlight were having difficulty adjusting to the darkness.  I could make out a single figure sitting on the edge of the bed.  Her voice finally removed any doubt.

“Warren, I’m so sorry.”  I wanted to respond, but Lise was a fast talker when she wanted to be.  “How could I have doubted you?  How could I have doubted what I experienced last night?  How could I be so jealous?”

I was thinking, “Well, sometimes what we need to do is to ask questions before we jump to conclusions,” but I really said, “I can understand how you were feeling.  You saw me with another woman in a compromising situation.  What else could you think?”  Then I added, “What did Doctor Manning tell you, Sweetheart?”

“What you already know.  Why didn’t you tell me?  She’s concealed it so well.  I had no idea.  I thought you were playing a trick on me and that you were secretly in love with her.”

“I promised Carol a long time ago, that this would be our secret.  So, how do you feel right now?”

“Stupid!  Embarrassed!”

“Lise, don’t feel bad.  I have nothing but what is left of an older man to give you.  But I can assure you of one thing.  The heart beating in my chest is owned by no one else but you.”  I sat down beside her in the flickering candle light, took her face in my hands.  “Lise, didn’t we marry last night?  Didn’t I promise to be faithful to you and not let anyone come between us?”

“Yes.  But no one else got to take part last night.”

“We can rectify that.  We can make that a part of the process, the protocol as I like to say.  But I don’t think anyone else belonged in that room but the two of us.”

She encircled me in her arms, kissed me hard on the mouth, several times all over my face and ran out of the room. 

“Thank you Carol,” I said out loud when Lise was gone.  It was all I could think of at that moment.   She had gotten me into the mess and she also got me out.  But now, Lise also knew the secret.  I hoped that she could keep it that way.

***

 Other than the misunderstanding with Lise, it had been a wonderful night, and morning.  The sunny, cloudless afternoon would be the perfect ending of an almost perfect beginning.  There was no point in waiting.  After all, we'd already experienced the wedding night.  And it was the ideal day for an outdoor get-together. 

There was no tuxedo, no fancy wedding dress, no preacher, but at about 4:00 P.M. two people confirmed their belief that marriage was still alive and well and renewed their commitment before the group of survivors of our small community.  After a brief ceremony, overseen by Doctor Manning in which we exchanged hastily prepared vows, we ate a delicious meal, obviously prepared well in advance.  Lise smiled her usual smile, her face aglow with her inward beauty that no others could match.  We didn’t sit at our table for this celebration.  Sitting next to Lise cross legged on a blanket, picking out viands from the platters set before us, I realized another fact.  Those smiling, happy, excited faces seated around us, were all in on it, even Bruce and Daniel.  Talk about a conspiracy!  How could I have been so blind?  One thing for sure, what people were thinking, was the least of our worries.